i realize that when im upset at someone, it’s usually because i expected something from them, or expected them to be a certain way…especially when it comes to family

there are certain unspoken rules or responsibilities about family i think…as children we expect parents to provide for us, and as a younger sibling (for myself) i expect my older sister to take care of me, and i expect myself to take care of my younger sister

but who made these rules anyway?

i’ve learned that no….i shouldn’t expect my parents to provide for me…if they raised me this far, then i have every right or responsibility to take care of myself, provide for myself and to even contribute to my parents, whatever they need, why do i always have this sense of entitlement? im not sure…but yeah if i dont expect from my parents, then there’s no need to get disappointed in them, or upset at them

and my sister….there’s no reason why i shouldn’t take care of her, i guess its cuz i feel like her mom, and the selfish me wants her to take care of me, because she’s my older sister u know? but in life there really are no “rules” things just “are” and we can’t say one way is better than the other

life is just life, im realizing HAHAHA

and you just need to live it, just take what life brings at you

and LIVE it, not just pass through it

oy im tired….im not sure why

OHHH I HAVE A SORE THROAT

AHHHHHH I THINK IM GETTING SICK 

@_@

that must be why im tired @_@

im usually a very strong girl….

meh

good night world